Tuesday, April 20, 2010

What volcano?

It snowed today.  In fact, it may snow again.  And it's April.  Freaking April!!

Isn't there a statute of limitations on winter?

I spent 5 months, count 'em FIVE MONTHS in the desert avoiding winter.  I do not want to be experiencing it now.  Especially when we should be having spring.  I don't want to hear about how it can be spring in Denmark and still snow.  I follow a strict philosophy when it comes to the seasons, one in which snow = winter.  I'll admit I was a little hesitant to join my fellow inhabitants of Denmark in celebrating the coming of spring.  The majority of the trees and bushes in my yard and lining the street on the way to Netto are still as bare and dead looking as they appear in the dead of winter and thus did not say "OHMYFREAKINGGODITSSPRINGYO!" but rather "uh, y'all celebrating prematurely" and while I am a bit better with nature than my husband, I am no Grizzly Adams.  So I bought into the idea that it was getting warmer.

Fool.  FOOL!!

Because it snowed today.  Big ol' puffy flakes of cold wetness drifting down upon the knit cap of our heroine.

Or would have drifted down upon her cap, expect she is NOT going outside in this.  Nope.  She's got toilet paper and pastrami and leftover frikadeller and some mushrooms, she doesn't *need* to go outside.

Except that if she keeps referring to herself in the third person, she may have to seek outside intervention.

But as the weather continues to confuse, confound, and generally obfuscate my life (like right now: brilliant sun... seconds ago I was trying to turn on a light, but failed because it was too dark to find the switch), I look for something to blame.

I mean, someone has to take responsibility for the this weather - I won't have it being an act of god.  I won't.

I'm blaming the ducks.  The ducks in the pond across the road from my house, specifically.  I'm sure they are up to something.  They certainly aren't your normal quack-waddle-quack ducks.  These guys are organized into an effective gang of duckishness.  Just yesterday our next door neighbor was a little slow in getting out to feed them and they sent a duck into his yard to remind him who was in charge.  Meanwhile the others milled about on the bank, quietly quacking amongst themselves.

There's something afoot here.  I'm sure of it.


  1. This post made me laugh :D

    I am sitting here in Australia wishing it would snow! It seems like the summer is never ending here and I would just love some cold weather.

    Please don't ban me from your blog now... :D


  2. Okay, as your best friend, I'm more than willing to share life experiences with you, but I'm not comfortable with having the same weather patterns when you are half a world away.

    We had spring...and not tepid, *maybe* Denmark spring, but a beautiful, warm and sunny California spring...and then it SNOWED yesterday and it's all cold and rainy today, and dammit, my herbs and my tomato plant are not liking better get those ducks in line, lady...

  3. It's the ducks, gotta be the ducks.


Keep it clean, don't be mean....