Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Dust bunny mafia wars

Dust bunnies ("nullernix" in Danish) have invaded my home. They were confined to the office for some time (I don't know about you but I don't unload and move bookcases just to vacuum behind them). Yesterday and the day before, they were unleashed by some idiot who decided to move her office to the other room.

Wait, wasn't that me?

Crap.

I'd been pretty good about keeping the rest of the apartment clean so we could show out the rooms. Apart from the Amazing Popcorn Kernels, who seem to appear out of thin air in the middle of the floor EVEN WHEN NO ONE HAS EATEN POPCORN, dust bunny evidence was NIL.

But yesterday as I betook myself to the restroom to do that thing I do... TMI!!... I noticed... DA DUM... I noticed..... DA DUM... I realized DA DA DA DA DA DA DAAAAAAA!!... I was surrounded on ALL SIDES by dust bunnies. And ALL SIDES is kinda hard to do when you are sitting on the can... TMI!! But it was true! I bent around and looked.

Everywhere!! And not little baby dust bunnies, but full grown MASSIVE dust bunnies. They're in the hallway. They're in the kitchen. They're in the entry way. I even found one out on the balcony, lurking in a corner.

I've been running around for the past two days with a vacuum cleaner. Thankfully I have a very long cord. But like the Hydra, it seems that for every one that I remove from this earth, several more leap up to take its place.

And it's a fight for life, my friends. Because while my allergy medicine is taking spring in stride and I can frolic in the outdoors and drive my pollen ridden car with the windows down and the radio blaring, I am miserable in my own home.

So, I've declared war. I will vacuum this house within an inch of it's life. But first I need to spray my nose, down a spare Benedryl and lay down with a damp cloth over my sinuses for about an hour. Would I cut off my nose to spite my face? Yes, if it meant it would BLOODY stop itching!

(Really, tragically, I am breathing better when I'm outside standing next to freshly mowed grass, which ALWAYS kills me, than I am in this dust bunny infested yet tastefully renovated apartment. ARGH!!)

6 comments:

  1. I wish you lived next to me LOL then you can declare dust war on my apartment too LOL

    It's kind of abandoned these days - my apartment (that is) especially with both birds Vic and Fluffy changing / shedding their feathers (it's the time of the year!) my apartment looks like one big bird nest :((

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  2. Poor you!

    And yet the moral is NOT to move your office every again nor to disturb those bookshelves.. I know I don't! ;-)

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  3. Moral of the story - let sleeping bookshelves lie.

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  4. I think I may have gotten 90% of them. Though I am contemplating asking everyone to vacuum themselves before entering. Hair too!

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  5. whee I have been blogrolled!
    Have you vaccumed your blog? I dont be wanting to catch any dust bunnies.

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Keep it clean, don't be mean....