Sunday, May 01, 2011

Positive results either way

I'm taking the theory part of my Danish drivers license tomorrow.

In Danish.

Whether or not I pass, I still win.

Pass: oh hells, yes, I rock!

Fail: well, it's not like I actually speak Danish, so how can they expect me to pass the first time around!  I win for every question I get right!

Meanwhile, we pick up the keys to our house today!  I have a house!!  I've only been able to pack up my books and other office stuff because:
A) I gotta baby, ya'll.  She demands food and fresh diapers and when we're going "hands free" (i.e. in the baby carrier) she really hates it when I bend over (baby suddenly goes upside down and tries to slide out of the carrier... really not a pleasant moment for any of us) or squat (little legs get smooshed).  I gotta pack when she naps.
B) I done run out of boxes.  You can look at this two ways - I need less books or I need more boxes.

Trick question.  Obviously I need more boxes.

I also need more bookshelves.  I found more books behind other books when I emptied the bookshelf.  Some I had put there to save space and some I had knocked down accidently when stuffing more books into, what turns out to be, too little space.

I've recently been promised more books if I get my ass out to the Copenhagen area.

Seriously, you can never have too many books.  Only not enough room for said books.

It's May 1st or "May Day" - which in certain parts of the world is International Workers Day.  There's a tent in the park across the street and a beer stand and red flags.  I can see drunk communists from my backyard!  And they wonder why I won't put my child out in the baby carriage unattended.  Don't they know my child could catch communism???

Also hard to believe: some people will not recognize the sarcasm in the above paragraph.

As Americans are losing the right to collective bargaining - in Wisconsin they've already lost the right - perhaps we should take a moment to reflect on workers rights and raise a beer in their honor.

Or erect a large phallic symbol and get young girls to dance around it.

My new house has a flag pole - all I need are some brightly colored ribbons and a man with a goat.  ('Cause all pagan rituals involve a man with a goat, dontcha know.)

I would have arranged for this to happen, but I'm busy studying for my theory test.

8 comments:

  1. I think the man with the goat is actually one being - a man with goat legs, or in other words a satyr ;)

    Not only are there books in Copenhagen but there are also . . . bookcases. But in case there aren't any visits possible soon, I do have all the Eddings books set aside and if we plan it right, we might be able to coordinate a handoff in Odense the first weekend of June.

    Good luck on the license test!!

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  2. Pan, fauns and satyrs may have shown up to pagan celebrations in the past, but these days it's always a man with a goat on a tether. It's like, 'we're lacking mystical gods made flesh, but HEY, at least Tim here brought a goat!'

    Or maybe I'm thinking of Renaissance Fairs...

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  3. Good luck tomorrow!! Hopefully your translator will be better than some I have heard horror stories about.... Maybe you will beat all the statistics around here and pass it the FIRST TIME!!
    Fingers crossed!!

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  4. Kelli, I'm not getting a translator - I'm doing it in Danish.

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  5. You are a brave, brave, woman. I wish you good vibes for your driving test!

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  6. Didn't pass - missed 9 (only allowed to miss 5) of 25. Balls! Lots of nasty trick questions and a few where all I could understand was "blah blah blah 75 blah blah should you blah blah blah oncoming traffic blah blah?" One unfortunate soul missed 20 questions. She was a bit "dude, W.T.F.?" I'd love to write a blog post about the experience... but who knows when I'll have the time! Now to move to our new house!!

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  7. Bugger. You'll do better next time, I am sure! There is also an online version of the test you can do for training purposes (http://www.teoriundervisning.dk/) it is pretty ok and it is probably possible to practise one-handed if you need to nurse or whatever it is newmums do??

    I always fail the tests too but when I look at the answers, I'm like "OH! OBVIOUSLY!"

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Keep it clean, don't be mean....