Wednesday, August 01, 2012

Operation Floor: The Never-ending Sanding

Here we are, day three of the floor project (not including all the days of moving furniture).  And. We. Are. Still. Sanding.

"Master" Bedroom
Looks pretty good, right?  It damn well should, the DB has been sanding for three days.  Things we've learned about this floor?
1) The wood is fabulous.
2) It was stained and then lacquered within an inch of it's life.
3) It's warped a bit.
4) It's made of room length boards that go under the skirting board.
5) There are no nails.

Wait, no nails?  How does the damn thing stay down?  NO ONE KNOWS!!!

Other things we learned?

A) Carpet glue is an asshole.
B) Carpet glue is an asshole.

So I spent Tuesday on my hands and knees, scraping glue off - not with the floor scraper one normally uses to remove softened varnish - but with a paint scraper held as a 45 degree angle.  I considered whipping out the trowel, but I worried I might start removing wood, rather than just glue and varnish, so I resisted.

Meanwhile, in the dining room...
Dining room
We've learned all about woodworm.  If we had the money, we'd just rip up the floor and lay a new one.  But if we ripped up the floor, we'd find the bare earth "foundation" our house is built over and feel the need to neoprene and insulate with foil faced fiberglass insulation, or whatever it is you do when your house is about a hundred years old and leaks heat like an unstable nuclear reactor.  But that would be $$$$$$$!!!!

So it's on to a pesticide to kill the buggers and then a thick lacquer to hold it all together for a few more years.  Eventually, we'd like to move the kitchen into this room and turn the kitchen into the dining room, so we'd be ripping up all the floors for insulation and pipe laying anyway.

But before we get to that, we obviously have to finish sanding.  It's just more of that ASSHOLE glue, old varnish and staining that has to get out of our way.  And even though it is in a bad condition, and this wood is not as fine as the wood in the bedroom, it's still made of room-length boards held down by god-only-knows.  Sheer ornery-ness?

Finally, the cat is not pleased with the disruption to his life.  He can't use his cat door, it's noisy and it smells weird.  Poor kitty!


  1. Whatever you do, do not stain the wood floors white! My landlords did this right before we moved in. It looks pretty for about five minutes, until someone walks on it. Then it turns gray from traffic and dirty dog toes. I have a bad feeling we'll be stripping and sanding before we leave, though I really hope we are able to avoid that asspain.

    (Firefox does not believe "asspain" is a real word. Silly Firefox.)

    1. Oh, and you guys are heroes for doing all this DIY stuff. Can we hire you guys if we do have to sand and stain?

    2. We had floors in Ebeltoft that were waxed with this expensive brand of floor wax that was white. They had to be washed with this expensive brand of floor soap. It discolored when you looked at it. So when we moved we had to sand and re-wax. And polish. And wax. And polish. And wax. And polish.

      Because it was on a deadline, we sanded, waxed, and polished for 24 straight hours. As the sun rose and the floor glistened in the morning light, we swore NEVER AGAIN with floor wax. Actually, I believe we swore never again to floor projects, because we straight up hired a pro to do the floor in Aarhus, but then again, that was 198 square meters of floor...

      No, come to think of it, we swore we'd never do floor projects again. What the HELL are we DOING???

    3. And "asspain" is totally a word, Firefox.

      Meanwhile, I'll ask the Danish Boy if he'd like to start sanding floors professionally in Norway. I mean, my god, this is the third floor sanding project - we can't possibly be n00bs anymore, amirite?

      Although, we are far better at painting, caulking, and plaster-patching (small holes only, please). We've painted 5 apartments (some multiple times) spread out over two countries. We are a two-person post-lease cleaning team! FTW!! Or at least For The Deposit Back!!

    4. You people are DIY machines! We've so far escaped doing any floors in rentals: likely because they were previously-lived-in canine abodes, which mean nail marks EVERYWHERE. But this time, I don't think so. The landlords had a helluva time getting the previous tenant out so they were still staining the floors while we were packing the farm house and on our way here.

      Famous landlord last words: "Maybe you could stay the night somewhere else and let it dry completely before you move in?" (As we stand there with two cars and a trailer full of stuff.)

      Now every spot on the floor that is covered by something, like furniture or rugs, is discolored. Every traffic area is gray. And then there are the dog nail marks.

      We are so SOL.

      If you guys are such gluttons for punishment, you may likely expect an email invite to Norway in a year or two. I'll bake.

  2. Even unfinished, the wood in your master is obviously gorgeous stuff, but I'm thinking area, the entire area. Blech...

    1. In the dining room, with the area rugs, obviously. My brain and my fingers are not communicating today.


Keep it clean, don't be mean....