Wednesday, July 07, 2010

Sometimes I wonder what other people think when they overhear our conversations

I just wonder, mind.  I'm not agonizing over it.  I'm not worried that people think I'm weird or that people don't think I'm weird.  Okay, I'm a little worried that they secretly hate me and will go home and pray that I'm struck down by a weird disease but that's only because these are STRANGERS we are talking about and we all know about "Stranger Danger"!

Actually, you might not know about "Stranger Danger" if you didn't grow up in Paranoid America.  You can find some awesome videos on YouTube.

Anyway, moving on.  The following conversation took place last night as we strolled about town.

Danish Boy: (exasperated because we have again stopped to take a picture) Can we do this later?  I thought we were on a walk!
Archaeogoddess: What, I can't stop and take a picture of cool stuff?
DB: But it's going to be dark soon and I wanted to go for a walk.
AG: Good god, I didn't know that when you said "walk" you meant "Bataan Death March"!

At which point two teenage girls rushed past, fearfully looking over their shoulders.  I doubt they know anything about the BDM and half of me wanted to shout out the historical reference I was making and the other half wanted to shout out "and no I will not use my indoor voice" because my husband was making that uncomfortable-face, the one he makes when I'm embarrassing him but he knows that he can't say anything about it without me REALLY embarrassing him, which I can do without batting an eye.

DB: (as we walk past the harbor) shhhh... not so loud.
AG: What?
DB: I said shhhh, not so loud.
AG: I can't hear you.  YOU HAVE TO SPEAK UP!
DB: I said "not so loud."
AG: WHY THE HELL NOT!?  I CAN'T GODDAMNED HEAR YOU! FOR CHRIST'S SAKE! YOU TALK SO DAMN QUIETLY!  SPEAK UP!!

I'm pretty sure that the universe has a horrible sense of humor and I'll end up going deaf, because that would drive my soft spoken mumbling husband absolutely insane.  At which point I'm going to start wearing underpants on my head, 'cause that'd just be funny.  Yup, I was put on this earth just to drive him mad.  Completely round the bend bonkers.

DB: (As we stop again) *le sigh*
AG: You know, when you take pictures, I have to stand around waiting for ages while you take a gazillion shots FROM THE EXACT SAME PLACE of the EXACT SAME THING and do I complain or force you to hurry up?  NO I DO NOT.  All I ask in return is the same common courtesy when I stop to take one or two very quick pictures of something before moving on.
DB: mumblemublemuble
AG: What?
DB: I SAID I'M SORRY!
AG: Jesus, baby, you don't need to yell.  I'm not deaf you know.

3 comments:

  1. Hm, similar conversations have taken place in the vicinity of my own. Not naming names here...

    Thanks for the laugh!

    ReplyDelete
  2. *grin*
    If that's the two of you now, imagine what you'll be like in 40 years.

    ReplyDelete
  3. May-lin is right...... these are prophecies of the future! LOL

    ReplyDelete

Keep it clean, don't be mean....