tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9130750.post3291520413405516209..comments2024-01-11T20:26:57.109+01:00Comments on Archaeogoddess: Maybe it's pregnancy irritability or maybe it's you, ya smug bitchArchaeogoddesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09305683483488880519noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9130750.post-30438921906683735122011-09-13T06:21:19.515+02:002011-09-13T06:21:19.515+02:00Thanks for writting info.As you have written in yo...Thanks for writting info.As you have written in your blog that Maybe it's pregnancy irritability or maybe it's you.It's very right that breastfeeding is better for baby. But sometimes it just doesn't work for mother or baby.But mother's milk is very good for baby.digital signaturehttp://www.arx.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9130750.post-26434211222768554152011-02-03T22:51:14.118+01:002011-02-03T22:51:14.118+01:00I was physically unable to breastfeed more than a ...I was physically unable to breastfeed more than a few drops at a time. I would feed as much collostrum in the hospital as I could but often, just to keep my sons' weight up I would 'tube supplement' (had a very fine tube taped to my nipple by the nurses, connected to a bottle of formula) while the baby was trying to suckle.<br /><br />I did really try to breastfeed my second son because all the practicioners said that I just wasn't trying hard enough or long enough. I pumped and pumped and stuffed my nipple in his mouth every single time he acted hungry (which was a lot) but there was just never enough. By the time he was six weeks old (and I'd been TURNED AWAY and told to TRY AGAIN twice!) he had lost an unacceptable amount of weight and I had a severe case of mastitis, which I was hospitallized for. Not nice, lemme tell ya. From then on I fed him formula, finally didn't feel too guilty about feeding my first son formula and by the time I had my third son I knew in my heart what was coming and accepted it.<br /><br />I've heard women swear that the only way to bond with your baby is to breastfeed. Bullshit. I'm not smug or self riteous about my decision - I did what I needed to for my kids. I still feel guilty that I couldn't provide everything that I wanted to, but I see now that they are not damaged, they are very healthy and we are all well bonded as a family because everyone got to play a part in feeding time.<br /><br />This is a really big issue with big feelings attached. As others have said on here, do what you feel is right for you and your baby. Breast milk is ideal, yes, but formula is pretty dang good these days.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15841909429785434537noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9130750.post-44181790194923581812011-02-02T20:44:50.419+01:002011-02-02T20:44:50.419+01:00Corinne, It's because the bottle teat is easie...Corinne, It's because the bottle teat is easier to get milk from than the nipple so the baby is like "dude, what are you trying to do to me? Give me the bottle, are you mad?"kellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04306427503749550858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9130750.post-52838278301213687222011-02-01T13:34:35.420+01:002011-02-01T13:34:35.420+01:00I hated breastfeeding. I don't know why, but ...I hated breastfeeding. I don't know why, but for some reason it totally squicked me out. There were some lovely moments when I could let the squickiness go, and bond with Cass, but mostly I hated it. I did it for three months and was sooo relieved when we found out she was lactose intolerant and needed to be on soy formula.<br /><br />I'm thrilled for people who loved breastfeeding, and thrilled for people who loved being pregnant, but I hate when they make me feel like a bad mother because I didn't love being pregnant and I hated breastfeeding. <br /><br />You'll be a fantastic mom, whether you breastfeed or not. And you won't smother your baby in smugness, which can have devastating effects later in life.Laurahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02432041328889618278noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9130750.post-65902092413082139432011-01-31T20:47:23.132+01:002011-01-31T20:47:23.132+01:00Babs, the woman with the finicky baby pumped. I ha...Babs, the woman with the finicky baby pumped. I have no idea how bottle-feeding breast milk affects taste or baby preference, but I do know she was frustrated with how the baby would only have a bit before tapering off and quit feeding so she supplemented with formula. As I said earlier, I'm not a mother. I don't know if you would consider bottle feeding breast milk breastfeeding or straight-up bottle feeding, as to me it seems the same substance if a different means of delivery. And from what I gather, the "breast is best" doctrine is concerned mostly with substance, or am bass-ackwards?Corinnehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12763599518417369688noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9130750.post-76201835831464879722011-01-30T23:02:54.291+01:002011-01-30T23:02:54.291+01:00I don't have children, but even standing on th...I don't have children, but even standing on the periphery and merely being an observer, it is my impression no-one is as hard on mothers as other mothers.<br /><br />And yes, plenty of judging and finding wanting, plenty of smugness, and plenty of very high horses, and I'm sure this is the last thing a new mother needs.Mayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12899351920200519306noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9130750.post-12192096937527919262011-01-30T21:20:33.752+01:002011-01-30T21:20:33.752+01:00I love your title.
I've met women who live ...I love your title. <br /><br />I've met women who live in absolute squalor, with alcoholic husbands and all sorts of fuckery hanging over their heads, with multiple lice ridden kids and grubby bottles of formula hanging out of their jam smeared faces who have had a better attitude to family life and kids than a lot of the 'we know what we doing and we got it right' middle class lot who do motherhood after research and feel they need to 'prove' themselves all the time. <br /><br />I've also met a lot of women who breastfeed without it being a 'concept'?<br /><br />It all depends on the individual. I happen to think that women need as much support to breastfeed 'properly' (i.e: past the first six weeks which is when women usually find out they don't have the support to do it) as do women who just can't hack what full time breastfeeding asks for to admit they need to grab a tub of that formula and start trying to stay awake through early hours scoop counts and microwave reheats.<br /><br />Bottle feeding, like birth with interventions, is so unfashionable right now, that those who are really only going to be happy doing the aforementioned are made to feel like pariahs in some birthing circles. But women need to do what they need to do. Natural birth and feeds are not for everyone: who the f cares? Their business.<br /><br />Point is, if a woman knows what she is doing, she doesn't normally have to tell everybody else she knows what she is doing.She just does it. But then the urge to give advice...I've not met a person yet who doesn't do that. It's just some people are nicer with it?<br /><br />My personal bugbear is being told ALL about child birth by people who haven't had kids,as if I didn't write the fecking book. Believe me, I get that a lot. In particular being told about the way birth works? AS IF I don't know already? That kind of naive arrogance is as annoying and smug as the woman in this feature you have written about.<br /><br />It's often naive and arrogant to tell others what is what. But what gets me is how women are much more ready to accept all sorts of advice from doctors and obstetricians because they have the qualification of the professional, but that we get riled when people who might (just might) know something we don't know, because they are experienced mothers and not professionals? We all hate the crone who knows best and prefer to listen to the man with the credentials. *shudder*<br /><br />Having said that, I have to reply to Corrine's reference about the kid who hated breastmilk (?!)...It has to be said that supplementing a difficult breastfeeder's food with formula in the first few months is ill advised and derails the establishment of successful breastfeeding. Many health professionals in Denmark seem ignorant to this and have had little training.<br /><br />'The Writer previously known as Babs' xxAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9130750.post-50255527437770767832011-01-29T20:25:35.569+01:002011-01-29T20:25:35.569+01:00You have to do what works best for you both at the...You have to do what works best for you both at the time. I can't understand these people that believe they have the right to question other people's personal decisions. It's like the natural birth thing. I did an NCT course in London (they promote natural birth and breastfeeding I was soon to find out!) with my first child. Soon afterwards the lecturer came to visit us with our newborns and quizzed us on "how well we had done" and what advice we would give for other mothers in labour. She didn't like my answer of "take everything they offer you" funnily enough...Emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06337410829335466284noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9130750.post-60222935173653780702011-01-29T17:57:33.759+01:002011-01-29T17:57:33.759+01:00Yeah, it's the smug-icity of self proclaimed s...Yeah, it's the smug-icity of self proclaimed spokespeople. Oh and the "best at life" peeing contest? Ugh.<br /><br />If there is something I cannot stand more than someone proclaiming loudly how superior they are, how great all their life decisions have been and how contented they are with their circumstances when it is OBVIOUS they are just as mixed up, guilty and disgruntled as everyone else then I have not encountered it yet.<br /><br />Give it up, ladies! Everyone is walking their path, everyone is questioning themselves and no one is having a wall-to-wall good time. You can stop pretending now.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9130750.post-67563258288867993312011-01-29T17:44:35.845+01:002011-01-29T17:44:35.845+01:00Uh, never had kids and don't plan to, but as a...Uh, never had kids and don't plan to, but as a woman with lots of breeding friends I get the periphery of the "breast is best" dogma. Sure, breast milk is best, but I agree, it's about what's best for the kid, too. <br /><br />I have a good friend whose first son hated breast milk, like the kids would take a few gulps and taper off. So she ended up doing formula every other feeding and called the doctor in a panic. She said the doctor told her, "The baby didn't read the books, he likes what he likes, and you need to do what works best for you and him."<br /><br />There it is in a nutshell. I feel sorry for the first time pregnant and the new moms, the pressure out there from an outsider looking in seems terrible. Props for being able to take it and still fire back at the blowhards. Lord knows my head would explode.Corinnehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12763599518417369688noreply@blogger.com